"There's too much urinary freedom in this society. I'm proud to hold it in. It builds character."

"Now you listen to me! I want details and I want them right now. I don’t have a job, I have no place to go… you’re not in the mood? well you get in the mood!"

"But, but I'm disturbed! I'm depressed! I'm inadequate! I got it all!"

i think i'm pretty much like you, only successful.

"It became very clear to me sitting out there today that every decision I've made in my entire life has been wrong. My life is the complete opposite of everything I want it to be. Every instinct I have, in every aspect of life, be it something to wear, something to eat - it's all been wrong."

"Oh, I got a hopper. A big hopper!"

"Why is nice bad? What kind of a sick society are we living in when nice is bad?"

This one is so good, had to leave it even though you have received your quota for the day...

"Hear me, and hear me well. The day will come. Oh yes! Mark my words! Your day of reckoning is coming, when an evil wind will blow through your little play world and wipe that smug smile off your face. And I'll be there, in all my glory, watching!"

"But I don't wanna be a pirate!"

"You're in the kitchen. You see an éclair in the receptacle. So you think to yourself, 'What the hell, I'll just eat some trash.'"

I know that you relate to that quote. ;)